Tagplanning

First, an Ending

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I’ve been thinking about what to do to speed up my writing. Every writer does, I’m sure. My own plans, as ephemeral and unstated as they are, involve a lot of speed, but more than speed, we cannot waste time. As per our previous criteria, of course.

If we are going to do some design work on the story before drafting (more soon), it is best to start with the ending.

That doesn’t necessarily mean write the ending first or know exactly how it ends. Instead, we should know what the end is and, most of the time, why it ends that way. What will be the final climax, what will be the general resolution, and when will the story stop? We need to know that last one most of all. Unless we begin at the creation of the universe and end at the last gasps of entropy, there is always more before the start and more after the end. There may be more before and after even then.

What we want to know is where the goal post is. Our job is now to reach that spot. In the first story I’m preparing to publishing serialized, I know what the final battle is. I know who is fighting, who will win, and why. How, I don’t know yet, and considering the contenders, it will be one insane pile of ridiculousness. But that’s the end of the story. That’s the final climax before things come to an end. I would hope it’s at least entertaining.

I know what the stopping point is, and despite that distance (god help me it is very, very far off), it feels real. I can imagine stories about what happens afterwards, and other things that could be said, but the narrative as a whole has a nice, clean, final moment there.

Knowing the the ending means I know what the arc of the people involved in that ending will be. After all, I have to bring the two combatants to that point, and if I have any idea what they are like, I know what kind of events and ideas will have to strike them to get them ready for the showdow.

And now, knowing that arc tells me where I need to begin it: I need a point where all the interesting parts of the arc come after, but as much of the boring stuff is before. With that, I now have the whole story. To end here, with this arc, starting at this point. The middle may be mushy and muddled, but that’s going to leave room to grow.

One could also work the other direction, and after starting with the ending, first decide the beginning. We want to reach that climax: where is the most impactful and emotional moment where we could start from? What starting point gives us the most to work with to drive home what we want to say to get to that ending? With that, we simple draw in a path between the points that seems interesting.

I’ve said before we’re not here to be literary, but a good story involves themes, foreshadowing, and grand ideas implied and explicitly shown through metaphor and symbolism. Hey look, foreshadowing involves knowing where the ending is, and then putting in moments earlier on that reference that. We can do that now. Themes and ideas and symbolism? If we know where to end, we know the climax. That will almost certainly push forward some ideas. Why this person wins the final showdown over the other really does capture a lot of what I want to say. So I will say those things a lot. We almost look literary.

Of course if we wrote the whole story first, we would be in the same boat. We could include all those things knowing full well where we’re going. But serials don’t have that luxury. We need to get the first section right before even thinking about writing the fifth, let alone the last. Besides, why not save ourselves more revision work? Build the ideas in earlier.

I know this works for me, and I understand how that isn’t exactly going to work for everyone. But there is another, small scale value to this. To use a fighting example again, I never want to sit down to write a conflict anymore without knowing who wins. It’s a failsafe: if I know the winner but they can’t pull it out, that’s going to set off warning flags immediately. Did I overlook something? Is the reason they’re going to win not powerful enough? Or does what I think happen in the story conflict with my more subconscious understanding of the story? Sometimes I’m wrong. But deciding first, and then watching my own reactions turns my unconscious from bias to tool.

More on that, too, in a bit.

A Walk With My Brain

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I already know I’m not going to be happy with how this post turns out. Part of me will always think it could have been better with more time, more work, more editing, more, well, anything.

I was supposed to have a post ready for today, but now, two hours before my deadline, I’m writing this instead. To be fair, a whole slew of things have happened, and while I was able to mostly maintain writing, I never got to editing anything to put here for Tuesdays. I’ve maintained the most important aspect — continuing to write — but I left all the other important parts aside.

When I try to figure out how I ended here: writing a post and throwing it up on the blog just to say I made my deadline –it feels the root cause is lack of planning. Yes, I had to deal with a whole slew of paperwork for my personal life, as well as some overtime at my regular job. But I came home and had to ask myself, every night, what should I do tonight? Mostly, think of something interesting to write about, and if I can muster the energy, do some editing or something.

That’s not sustainable. Not only that, it’s not going to produce anything good, either.

Of course, a plan only gets us as far as we’ve planned. I can sit and make whole lists of ideas and posts to create, but the moment things veer off course, well, the plan needs scrapping then, doesn’t it? That’s the danger of over-planning: either wasteful with all the changes when the ground shifts, or running into a wall because we decided not to adapt.

This probably isn’t an important moment, but I know I want to think it is. I want to tell myself, oh, this is the time when I changed from this kind of person to that kind, and always the new person is better.

Enthusiasm and grit got me this far, but doggedness and professionalism will carry me through the harder days. Or, sometimes, just enthusiasm carried me here, and sheer grit will solve it. Or, other times, grit got me here, but now, lacking the joy and exuberance of earlier times, I need to remind myself why I want to do this whole project and use that to drive me onward.

It all feels like so much thinking, and so little substance. Maybe I need a plan, but I only have to look back three months ago to the endless plans which got shitcanned before the blog ever started. I feel the lack of energy, and the lack of passion, and the lack of will to fight through the troubles, but I have been tired, I have been struggling to keep on top of things, and I have forgotten some of the reasons why I want to do this. Then I get a good nights sleep, or read a book I enjoy, or finish a little draft despite barely feeling like moving at all, and suddenly it all comes back, for one fleeting moment.

I have no intention of quitting. More than anything, I want to keep my promise of last week, and have something real to share during the week after next. I still have faith I can pull it off, somehow.

So, what am I writing this for? To feel sorry for myself in public? That seems childish and dumb. To try and show my vulnerability and lack of confidence, that even the people who can stand up and call out to do the right thing still face such demons every day? I haven’t really said or done anything noteworthy to deserve sharing that.

No, I think I want it to be something else: to raise the question of how to best balance this whole thing. I really do believe my crazy projects are doable and sustainable, but physically accomplishing them is not simple or easy. I’m already struggling with the basics, after all. It feels dishonest to hide that, though, so bringing the question to light? Will that help?

I’m not going to edit this post. I’ll clean up some spelling mistakes, take a read through, and probably cut the egregious waste, but I’m going to leave it as it is. Maybe to reach back for that middle idea, that I want to show more of what it’s really like doing this work. Maybe to just get this whole piece over with, so I can rest and relax tonight instead of doing the work I’m supposed to do. Perhaps to be edgy, different, from other people — look at me, I don’t bother putting up quality content! Or maybe, just to plant a flag in the road.

A flag, someday, that I can look back to, and say if I’ve learned anything or not. I don’t think I expect to. But, if I do, here’s a nice marker to look back on.

There’s more work to be done, and I probably need to form a real plan for what to write about going forward. Actual work, actual knowledge, actual skill to obtain and share here. Maybe, though, this can serve as a beacon: the worst, most idiotic thing I’ve put up on the blog. It wouldn’t be so bad to get that out of the way early, if nothing else.

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